FAke BY THe DOzen

I’m not quite sure whether other citizens say the same about their countries but we Kenyans are of a peculiar nature. We complain about things within our powers to change and yet when we are faced with an opportunity to set matters right, we forget we ever complained and maintain the status quo.  

We castigate others on how they run things but do the same or even worse when given the opportunity to act. We condone poor service

We are peculiar in the kind of relationships we maintain. We chose to remain in abusive relationships for reasons that are beneficial to everyone else but us. We chose to do things for the society’s sake, we chose to do stuff for ‘our
leader’s’ sake, we are too lazy to find working alternatives, we are afraid to explore options. A good friend of mine chooses to use the words fake it till you get it right. 

We find workarounds to things that we can perfect. We lose opportunities to be with the ones we truly love because we can fake an alternative. We remain in jobs that are not fulfilling because we are too lazy or too afraid to chase after our passions, we hold tightly to our branches of insecurity afraid that if we let go, we shall fall into the abyss of oblivion.

But what if we can only realize our potential to fly when we release that branch we are holding onto? What if unlike eaglets there is no mother eagle to throw us out of the nest? What if in our first attempt to fly we hit the rock bottom? Is that the end of life as we know it?

If you are a subscriber to a mobile service provider that makes you want to pluck out your eyebrows every time they send you a text to say you are running low on airtime, or bundles; one that makes you feel like you are being robbed in broad daylight yet you keep resisting the urge to move, you find all possible excuses to stick around despite lucrative offers from competition, YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

If you have friends who only remember you exist on Friday or any other day they need some company for clubbing. Those that remember you only when they have a big event where your wallet can come in handy, those that contact you when they need a bail out and disappear when you come through, those that don’t keep promises and will bombard you with excuses that span the length of the Nile river, those that lie to you with the least of remorse,

 YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

If you faithfully vote for a politician whom you clearly know has nothing between their ears year in year out. One who puts national security at risk every time they open their mouth in a public gathering. That kind of ‘leader’ who does not know the difference between a Government of Kenya bank account and their personal account. The kind of ‘leader’ who has a tarmac road terminating at their compound in the rural area. That kind who thinks being a man of the people is getting into the local pub whenever they visit and ordering the barman to give everyone “biri biri ya kire manakunywa”, yes that species who will burn the midnight oil when a debate concerns a bill that has billions camouflaged in their best interest. The same one who comes to you after being arraigned in corruption charges to tell you ‘they’ want to ‘finish our community’ YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

If you toss in bed every morning hoping a tornado will sweep the tarmac away 

so that you can have an excuse not to report to work that day. YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

If he introduces you to his friends like “oyu niwe pipo wa mine”; LOL. clobber him with a blunt metallic object: YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

                                               If he she hits you,

                                                                      YOU
                                                      ARE IN AN 
                                         ABUSIVE
                  RELATIONSHIP

If he forgets every important anniversary, never complements a new hairdo, a new outfit, if he no longer says the sweet nothings he used to say when you first started dating. If his answer to the question “honey how do I look” is “you look fat”, YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

If you are with him simply because he is TD&H, dresses like Kanye West, has the swag of Usain Bolt and the arrogance of Mario Balloteli, I gat news for you; YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

If she’s not a home-keeper, thinks beauty is a substitute for brains, cannot maintain a logical conversation, wakes, walks, sleeps and dreams partying and fun, get a life; 

YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

If you always mumble a prayer when half a sleep and you don’t even remember saying an amen, if you only remember your maker when you are in trouble and need him to come through for you, YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

if you are hoping to go to heaven just because you “healed a boy with a heart condition by simply clicking ‘LIKE’ on facebook” or “you never killed the message that had already been forwarded by millions because in 10minutes something miraculous was going to happen to you”, If you have friends who place threats on religious messages just to force you to act out of guilt and fear, then

                             YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

All around us we form relationships that are fake. Ones not based on merit or mutual benefits. We weave all this into one large society of fakes. The government may go out of its way to protect us from fake consumer products but it is entirely on us to make amends on our relationships

Make them real. Be honest in why we are in them. Seek mutuality instead of one sided benefits. Step out of that comfortable boat and you’ll realize that maybe you can walk on water. Regain that lost energy used every day in maintaining fake relationships. Be real in what you want and maybe, just maybe, the world will be real back at-cha