It
was the night before Christmas and Sue Anne Marie sat at her husband’s bedside
and toyed with her wedding ring absent mindedly. The speakers in the room
hymned Bonny M’s jingle bells in a soft yet magnetic tune. Her emotions were a
blend of fear and anger. She directed her anger towards Bonny M. How could the bells continue to jingle? How
could Christmas remain merry while the love of her life lay before her
helpless? Fighting for his dear life? She refocused the anger back at him… he should have listened to her…then at
herself… she should have been more firm.
Her mind did not spare her the torture. Her body had been through enough in one
night.
“Honey,
let me have those keys please.” Sue Anne Marie had told him on realizing that
he almost toppled over the Christmas mascot at Safari Park.
“Sam
dear,” those close to her called her Sam, “we’ve already gone through this many
times before. You can’t take on B until the one month mandatory test drive is
over.” The BMW in question was a week old in the family and apparently, it was
“bad omen” if she were to drive it before he had spent a whole month behind its
wheels. Ken was stubborn. She knew he would not relent on his quest to have the
BMW to himself for a whole month. He
should have listened to her.
She
took a long glance at him. Still. Motionless. See-sawing between life and
death. He had been full of life and vigour just hours ago. There was no telling
whether he was still in there or not, wrestling for his life. Defying death.
Her only hope and assurance lay in the machines nearby. As long as the screen
showed a continuous graph of waves, as long as the beeping sound was distinct
and digital, then her man was still in there.
She
was all alone with him. She had avoided calling family and friends. She did not
want to ruin the Christmas Eve for everybody… Her bag! Where was her handbag?
Every form of identity and contacts she had were in that handbag. She would ask
the doctor whether their personal belongings had accompanied them to the
hospital… The doctor! Where on earth was he? Where in the world were all the
nurses? Were they not supposed to be in the room with her? Watching over? Just
in case? She strolled out to find the doctor. She was one big mass of
confusion. It was the worst moment to be all alone…
The
BMW had sped off down Thika highway at a thrilling speed. The test driver had to be convinced that his
baby could do the speeds they said she could do. Every other motorist was in a
hurry. It would be unfair to be stranded on the highway on Christmas Eve. There
were parties to go to and juggle through, more beer to be consumed waiting
elsewhere, relatives calling to ask why you hadn’t arrived yet. The night
before Christmas was supposed to be a silent night. Modern technology and
indulgencies had made it the second rowdiest night after New Year’s Eve. It had
only been ten when they left Safari Park but he had already consumed one too
many. She should have been more firm with
him…
The
hospital was graveyard silent. Many had defied the urge to be sick on Christmas
Eve. The few present were too sick to cause any activity. Too sick to move. Too
injured to express their pain. The few relatives who were around religiously
camped at their loved ones bedsides with the devotion of a monk in a monastery.
Engaging in small talk was the last thing on their minds. Sue Anne Marie stood
in the corridor of the vast ICU unit. She was still deep in thought. There she
was in the middle of the greatest battle ground on earth. The place where life
was won and lost on a daily basis. Her soldier was in that battle field.
Fighting the silent war. The war of the spirits. She walked past room 12B. The
beep had just become continuous and the wavy graph on the monitor had become a
horizontal line. A soldier was down. Death had just claimed a victory. Even in
a night as holy as the night before Christmas, the angel of death still made
rounds. There was no entente in this
battleground. Death art thou a villain!
Sue Anne Marie concluded her thought and rushed back to her husband’s room. He
wasn’t going to fight alone. She would help him defeat death…
The
lorry would have flattened their car to a pulp. His two weeks old wife would
not have survived the impact from her side. Both drivers were doing need for speed. Ken was negotiating the
GSU roundabout while the lorry driver was seeking an entry from the outer ring
road. Their friends were waiting. He had promised his boys that they would be
at the Carnivore in less than thirty minutes. How else would they know that he
had a new BMW. At Safari Park, he had taken several shots of Johnnie Walker’s
blue label mostly on the rocks but once in a while neat. She should not have
allowed him to drive. He should have
listened to her...
She
held his arm and tried squeezing it. No response. The strong masculine arms
that had swept her off the floor on her wedding night could now not return a
feeble squeeze. She would have given the whole world to make him know that he
was not alone. That everything would be ok at the end. That he would be up and
running soon to complete his compulsory one month test drive. She wondered
where they had towed his BMW to. She had reason to believe that it would be the
first thing he would ask about on regaining consciousness. She promised herself
not to get jealous just in case. She could live with that. Sue Anne Marie could
live with anything as long as her man was out of that bed. Alive and well. She
will then be more firm with his indulgencies. She should have been more firm...
In
a flash, he had placed his left hand on her tummy, murmured some I love you both honey and swerved
violently to his side. She arched forward then the safety belt pulled her back
to her sit. She lost consciousness. The lorry zoomed past; unscathed.
She
and ken had dated for the past three years. They had met each other when she
was an intern with a leading audit firm and he an ambitious section manager on
a vigorous bid to make partner. It was his stubbornness and intelligence that
had won her heart. Despite the corporate image and the thick skin developed due
to cut throat competition, he still managed to be a gentleman and knew how to
treat a lady. He was a hands on guy. He had heavily influenced the architecture
of their house that was coming up in Runda. He had been involved totally in
their wedding plans and had even picked the shape of their cake single
handedly. He loved perfection. He was perfect for her…
The
accident had left her unharmed. She must have passed out from panic. They had
placed her in the general ward for tests and observation and taken him to the
ICU for life support. He was the first person she had insisted on seeing when
she regained consciousness. The nurse had insisted on her taking a rest for the
night before worrying about him. She had threatened to comb the whole hospital
in search of her love if they did not take her to him. The doctor had known
better than to argue. She was also stubborn.
The
doctor roused her from her thoughts unceremoniously. She was still tightly
gripping his hand. Hoping to sense some motion in him.
“You
need to get some sleep Sue” the young doctor advised. He was their family
physician. “It’s been a long night.”
How
could she go to sleep and leave him in that condition? How could she find sleep
not knowing whether she would wake up on Christmas morning a widow? No, she
would not sleep.
“I’m
ok Jack.” She dismissed the sleep suggestion. “How’s he?”
“We’ve
run some tests and more are to follow in the morning. Ken suffered a spinal
cord disjunction just below the neck. His chances of survival are very high no
doubt about that but he might have to live on a wheelchair for the rest of his
life.”
Sue
Anne Marie was in tears all this time. She could not tell whether she was
crying from the joy of being told that he would live or from the pain of
knowing that he would be disabled for the remainder of his life. She mumbled
some question.
“Why
for the rest of his life Jack? Why not a week, maybe a month? Why forever?” she
was not ready to loose her man to disability if there was a way out. There were
kids to be made and raised. Careers to be advanced. A lifetime on a chair? Hell
no.
“The
nerves affected controls movement of the lower limbs. As at now, he has
suffered total limb impairment. The section can however go through a natural
self healing process over time. It will all depend on how badly a patient wants
to walk again. There are those who through sheer willpower are able to initiate
the repair process faster while others fail and are wheeled for life.
“Isn’t
there anything anyone can do to aid the process? Surgery in the West maybe?”
“Nothing
that I say to you right now is conclusive Sue. We will need to do more tests.
See how he responds to treatment. The spinal cord is one of the body parts
that’s best left alone.” You shouldn’t
have allowed him to drive while drunk. He wanted to add but on second
thought he decided not to. He had attended the same high school with ken and
knew that he could be stubborn.
He
looked at him lying there helpless and his eyes welled with tears. He bit his
lower lip and looked away to suppress an outburst. Many years ago in school,
Ken had told him that if he went ahead and became a doctor, he would make him
his family doctor. While joking about his good health, he had added that he
would end up writing fat cheques to Jack for services and advice he would never
use. That had been a long time ago. Who would have thought then that this day
would come to pass at a time like this: the night before Christmas? A tear dropped
to the floor. He blew his nose like one who had been crying all night. There
was nothing to hide from Sue Anne Marie.
“He’s
one hell of a buddy.” He told her.
“He’s
one hell of a hubby” she replied.
He
reached over and touched Ken’s forehead. Then he touched Sue Anne Marie’s
shoulder and said.
“Ken
will get out of this. I’ll do everything possible to get him back on his feet
ASAP. A combination of medicine and miracle has been known to work in the past.
I’ll need you to be strong for him.” He rubbed her shoulder and walked towards
the door. He believed in his words. She believed in them too. At the door, Jack
stopped and turned.
“BTW,
the babies are doing fine.”
“Wha-”
she was about to ask what babies but decided otherwise. Jack did not wait for a
reaction. How could she not know?
Was
her path crossing with that of providence? On helping with the design of their
new house, Ken had insisted on the design being accommodative of people with
disability. There was no way he would have known that she was pregnant before
she did yet just before the accident, he had placed his hand on her tummy and
said I love you both honey. She had
thought he meant her and his BMW then.
She
took his arm and placed it on her belly. She felt a slight motion in him. She
knew he would be well soon. They would pray for that miracle fervently.
Daybreak
was already changing shifts with the night when she fell asleep beside him, his
hand still on her tummy. In a way, her fear had given way to hope. She sensed
and believed that everything would end up okay. There were better days ahead.
Everything was dead silent except for the reassuring beeps from the life
support machines. It was the longest night before Christmas this…
*****
Happy Holidays. indulge responsibly.
